Tuesday, January 25, 2011
"We're on a mission from God"
Well, first thing this morning I open up my MSNBC,and whatta ya know? The heading of "How kids can ruin your marriage" hits me like a punch in the mouth. Dang. Actually,this has been in the forfront lately of what little mind I have left. Freeking kids. Oh, it all starts out innocent enough. Little booties, soft blankets, sniffing their little Baby Magic scrubbed heads. Oh, the siren song of the womb. Well, here is some advise. Muzzle your uterus, bitches, cuz that turns into "The song that never ends" real quick.Trust me, ive been digging out for real close to 29 years now, and havent made it. and Im not even counting my 2 beautiful grandkids. No, im STILL a card carring PTA, i need a powdered wig made out of cotton balls, i spent my lunch money on cookies, you cant call the other alter boys "SuckSacks" (well, not during Mass, anyway) participant. I startred this shit in 1982, ya think i would have found the exit by now. This is all Gods doing, by the way. Yes, i mean it in all ways. My oldest was brought into this world kinda the old fashioned way, with absolutly no thought other than "Wow, it seems like baby time!" My youngest, well, he is The Burning Bush Baby. And im not refering to the fucking 4 inch episiotomy they had to perform to get his massive head out of my chuckie, either. God TOLD me to make way for him. Swear on my life, hope to die, needle in the eye shit. . Almost 18 years after my first. So please pardon me if I laugh and maybe pee a bit (see aformentioned chuckie damage listed above) at all the shmachta about how these human Chupacabras complete us, bring us so much joy, will be such a comfort in our old age..... someone call me at least 12 hours before these beneys start up, will ya, cuz I wanna be sober for it. I guess the bottom line is, sometimes, we are just the vehichle. It all stops being about us, whether we know it, or ultimatley like it or not. And if were really lucky, every now and again, we do get a kick outta the job. But Lord, dont be making no more of those 2 a.m. calls to me anymore. Im hip to your tactics. And Ive got my phone on mute.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Someone to watch over me.......
Hey kids, its been a while. Not that i havent had shit to say, just then when im in my "creative" mojo, by the next day, Ive forgotten what the frig I was so impressed with the night before. Kinda like beer goggles for us literatti. Bwahaha. Anywho, my loves in the great altered-State of Utah have refreshed my memory, and im baaaaak.
Next month, my family will be celebrating something that folks do all the time. The baby shower for my niece Tisha and her awesome husband Matthew, in honor of our newest, little Zoe. This little girl is so special in so many ways, as all babies are, but, actually, shes kinda our special gift. On Father's Day, 2009, her big sister, Teigan, was murdered, by her own father, who's name I will never infect my mouth with, or honor that he ever existed on this Earth as anything but a messanger of ruin. On that day, everything that I thought I knew about was thrown into chaos. I watched in so much fear, scared cold that the people I loved the most , that there was no way they could survive this. My Big sis, Mikey, Teigan's grandmother, my closest friend, who raised me and saved my life more times than I dare think about, her reason for living was gone. Just, gone. What do I do? What do I say? Because of my own losses in my life, Ive got a pretty strong grip on what I believe is our destiny. Im the first one to speak up in my infinite wisdom....Father has his plan...The book is written..... all my brilliant, spiritual golden chains shattered by the sheer perversion of this moment in time that changed EVERYTHING. So we gathered, and we grieved. And believe me, up until that time I thought the reference "broken heart" was just something someone sang about. That week, with the people that mean so much to me, I laughed and cried more than I had ever done in my life. And once again, God showed his grace. We began to breathe again. Slowly, bitterly,for sure. And He stayed. And this time, Teigan became his messanger.
Since then, we have had some beautiful moments in our lives. Most notible the wedding of my dear Tisha to a wonderful, loving man named Matthew. Which, um, incidentally, I officiated. Hey, when I marry 'em, they stay married. Little did we know the day we stood before God, that our little Zoe was already there. And, yes, in some freeky way I take more than a bit of credit for that, too. Sorry, Matthew. Yep, that lil chica is gonna have a charmed life. This is OUR baby. Our gift from God, and from Magoo too.Because I never got a chance to tell her how special she was. And for that, Im the poorer. Teigan's life is now the touchstone of how I love. Be open,honest, and never wait, not one second, to speak your intentions.No regrets. No shame. The people I love know it. I am a proud strand in every web . And that, Im telling you, is all I need.
Next month, my family will be celebrating something that folks do all the time. The baby shower for my niece Tisha and her awesome husband Matthew, in honor of our newest, little Zoe. This little girl is so special in so many ways, as all babies are, but, actually, shes kinda our special gift. On Father's Day, 2009, her big sister, Teigan, was murdered, by her own father, who's name I will never infect my mouth with, or honor that he ever existed on this Earth as anything but a messanger of ruin. On that day, everything that I thought I knew about was thrown into chaos. I watched in so much fear, scared cold that the people I loved the most , that there was no way they could survive this. My Big sis, Mikey, Teigan's grandmother, my closest friend, who raised me and saved my life more times than I dare think about, her reason for living was gone. Just, gone. What do I do? What do I say? Because of my own losses in my life, Ive got a pretty strong grip on what I believe is our destiny. Im the first one to speak up in my infinite wisdom....Father has his plan...The book is written..... all my brilliant, spiritual golden chains shattered by the sheer perversion of this moment in time that changed EVERYTHING. So we gathered, and we grieved. And believe me, up until that time I thought the reference "broken heart" was just something someone sang about. That week, with the people that mean so much to me, I laughed and cried more than I had ever done in my life. And once again, God showed his grace. We began to breathe again. Slowly, bitterly,for sure. And He stayed. And this time, Teigan became his messanger.
Since then, we have had some beautiful moments in our lives. Most notible the wedding of my dear Tisha to a wonderful, loving man named Matthew. Which, um, incidentally, I officiated. Hey, when I marry 'em, they stay married. Little did we know the day we stood before God, that our little Zoe was already there. And, yes, in some freeky way I take more than a bit of credit for that, too. Sorry, Matthew. Yep, that lil chica is gonna have a charmed life. This is OUR baby. Our gift from God, and from Magoo too.Because I never got a chance to tell her how special she was. And for that, Im the poorer. Teigan's life is now the touchstone of how I love. Be open,honest, and never wait, not one second, to speak your intentions.No regrets. No shame. The people I love know it. I am a proud strand in every web . And that, Im telling you, is all I need.
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